#9: Problems make you happy.
Some of the most important truths in life don’t make sense on the surface, but once you get beneath it, the world will never look the same.
I noticed this the first time I fell in love. There was a girl in my high school class I liked a lot. Shoulder-long, brown hair, beautiful face, a heart-melting laugh, and eyes I could’ve stared into forever, or at least until the bell announced the next algebra session.
Like most high school kids, I thought I just needed to be nice and loving for her to reciprocate my feelings. Spoiler: It didn’t…
…but repel them instead.
Attraction is a tough topic.
Men and women both sometimes go to ridiculous lengths to woo potential partners. But well-meant isn’t always well-done, as overinflated lips and guys posing in front of rented Lamborghinis show.
I know what it’s like. I tried to be the “alpha” guy for years until I realized the very behaviors I thought made me attractive turned me into the sexual equivalent of stale goulash soup. But men aren’t the only ones selling themselves out.
Both sexes do stupid things to be more attractive, but as a man who’s spent a few years of his life…
Lessons from hitting rock-bottom.
Two years ago, I was in a dark place. Mindless and pointless distractions ate away most of my time. A toxic relationship and negative friends held me back and sucked the energy out of me. I studied something I didn’t enjoy and had no idea what to do with my life.
Today, I’m earning money with what I’m passionate about. I’m in a healthy relationship with an incredibly supportive woman who checks most of the boxes. The toxic friends who once wreaked havoc in my life do so no longer. I know who I am, I’ve got a clear trajectory…
Life’s too short to spend it with the wrong people.
Connecting with others can be a huge source of joy, but also means investing time and energy — and as any good investor, you want to get the most bang for your buck.
New friendships are like wine. No matter how fancy the bottle, if there was contamination in the beginning, it will turn into sour vinegar. You don’t want to pour blood, sweat, and tears into something only to flush it down the drain.
But if you screen people right, you can forge a strong connection that lasts a lifetime — here are five signs someone’s worth bonding with.
They Share This Characteristic with Dogs
…
#1: Resentment only hurts yourself.
Most of the time, your life is full of joyful experiences — at least until someone stabs you in the back with a rusty machete.
The partner who cheats on you. The friend who bitches behind your back. The boss you’ve sacrificed thousands of hours for but who drops you like a hot potato to make a profit.
Ask anyone and they’ll tell you to “forgive and move on.”
This is obvious, but it’s hard to do when you hate someone’s guts and they’ve been an inconsiderate asshat who backstabbed you like Brutus his father Caesar. If you don’t let…
THE AUTHENTIC MAN LETTER 1
Every second Friday, I send out the Authentic Man 5–3–1 Newsletter to help men become more authentic and live a more meaningful life.
5 Minutes | 3 Ideas, Quotes, and Questions | 1 Challenge
1 IDEA FROM ME
Instead of focusing on what you need to do, focus on who you need to become.
Lasting change and improvement is hard because you have to battle a worthy opponent: Yourself.
Behaviors can be adopted quickly. Everybody can go and work out for a few weeks. But what good is it if you revert to old behaviors?
World-class athletes don’t train six times a week because they have to, but because it’s what world-class athletes do.
Warren Buffett…
Your life could be so much more.
Most of your dreams won’t shatter in a Hollywood-like scene with explosions, sirens, and heart-melting drama. Instead, your hopes and aspirations fall victim to a silent killer.
Mediocrity buries them before they even sprout. Why work your butt off for your dream job if your current one is just fine? Why sweat blood and tears for a beach body if everyone else flaunts their love handles? Why work on your relationship if watching Netflix and eating takeaway together does the job? Everything’s fine as it is — except it isn’t.
I’m not telling you how to live your life, but…
3 practical lessons from my favorite books.
Life is beautiful, but sometimes it hits you in the face. With a chair. Swung by the incredible hulk. You can’t avoid it, but what you do when it happens makes all the difference.
On a Monday a few weeks ago, I met with my girlfriend to rent an apartment together and book flights for our summer holiday. Instead, she told me she needs some time apart to sort out her life, wasn’t herself in our relationship anyway, and hated parts of my character and way of living. What a lovely way to start the week.
When you break up…
Inhale, exhale, and a bit of creative magic in between.
Good writing is like breathing deeply.
When you breathe, you suck air into your lungs, your body processes the oxygen, and you exhale carbon dioxide. When you write, you ingest new information, your brain does a little bit of creative magic, and you vomit your words on the page. If you only use 70% of your lungs in sports, you leave potential on the table — and the same is true for writing.
World-class athletes practice proper breathing to increase their performance and if you want to become a better writer, you have to hone your technique as well.
Living a meaningful life isn’t what you think.
Finding purpose is hard as it is — but it becomes next to impossible if you fall victim to one of the many misconceptions about the subject.
This isn’t your fault. If nobody ever told you the earth was round, you’d fear falling from the edge, too. The official Flat Earth society still does.
As this community of low-voltage brains shows, the internet allows everyone to have a voice. This leads to erroneous beliefs that distort the picture like a butt-lifted and photoshopped Kylie Jenner the beauty standards of teenage girls. …
